


Fern Fiction

by Yotsubadancesintherain5



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon), Super Mario & Related Fandoms
Genre: F/F, Gen, Humor, Tongue-in-cheek, this is really goofy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-02
Updated: 2016-11-02
Packaged: 2018-08-28 14:30:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8449987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yotsubadancesintherain5/pseuds/Yotsubadancesintherain5
Summary: When I talked with a friend, I used "fernfiction" instead of fanfiction. Shen then made a bet with me about whether I could make fanfiction with ferns interesting. She liked them in the end.





	1. plants are pets you don't have to worry about getting out

At first it was just one fern resting pleasantly on the windowsill. The fern had been there for a long time now, silently watching over the house.

The fern heard an energetic conversation, filled with giggles and exasperation, when they were first brought to the windowsill. The fern had been taking in sunbeams.

  
_"I'm going to name the fern Luigi."_

_"Oh my God."_

_"Hey, hey, don't give me that look! Look at the leaves! Don't they look like his mustache?"_

When a fern receives a name, that's all they need. A fern is the name received.

But it was nice to get indulgences.

Luigi had received a pine green ribbon, tied around the pot. The fern figured it had something to do with the namesake.

The sunbeams were nourishing and the water plentiful.

And one day, there was a new fern placed alongside Luigi. This new fern had an orange ribbon tied around the pot.

_"You named the fern Daisy?"_

_"Well, you did say it would be cute."_

_"True."_

In any case, it was nice to have a companion. Sunbeams, water, voices that spoke daily and another fern.

Can't speak, can't move

But happy.

 

 


	2. by order of the willows i pronounce your roots to be torn out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A re-telling of The Answer.

In another world red ferns were gifts, the seed sacred and rare, guarding over the land.

But here, Homeworld, they were as common as the fresh, earthy grass or scattered stretches of sand.

All kinds of plants loomed over the Earth. There were soldiers and emissaries waiting upon their Weeping Willow, the smell of war stifling the air.   
The red ferns surrounded the ever important blue fern. Her deep blue leaves were as soft as silk.

The blue fern was given the name Sapphire, after the stone that mysteriously appeared in her pot when she sprouted. The upper plants believed it to be a prophecy, a sign of wisdom.

Indeed, Sapphire had a special gift of wisdom; the ability to glimpse into the future, to see its winding paths.

She told her Weeping Willow of the renegades of Earth that would arrive soon.

Their roots would be torn off and Homeworld would forget about them.

-

But it went wrong.

A lone red fern feared that Sapphire's roots would be severed by the renegade Silver Maple and shoved her out of the way.

Something terrifying appeared in their place. It was wrong and disturbing and the red fern would be destroyed.

It was a split second decision.

Sapphire grabbed the red fern and they fell to the Earth.

-

There were square, red gems at their roots when they landed.

"Why did you do that?" the red fern demanded.

"They were going to severe your roots," Sapphire replied quietly.

"I don't care, I'm replaceable!"

Sapphire turned away and hurriedly picked up one of the gems. She passed it to the red fern.

"Please, take this name, Ruby," she pleaded. "You are not replaceable."

-

Ruby lead Sapphire along the lake, the water nourishing.

It was just them now, a perfect state of neutral. No Homeworld, no renegades.

Just Sapphire and Ruby.

They allowed themselves to be that plant again.

The leaves thick, colored red and blue, never merging. The trunk sturdy, black and red and blue, the roots strong.

Terrifying ( _beautiful_ ).

And this new one found the renegades, declared herself a fugitive and was welcomed instantly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friend remembered a very specific detail about this one and I was flattered. Information about red ferns come from the children's book (somehow because it's pretty graphic) Where the Red Fern Grows. The thought here is that the plants walk around on their roots.

**Author's Note:**

> The people talking can be whoever you wish, but my personal thought is that they are my friend and me.


End file.
